I have a friend who has a german shepard, whose name is Bear. And every morning, the neighbor walks her dog, Cindy. When Bear saw Cindy, her hair was in ponytails like a cheerleader and they had shaved her ass… so it was bare underneath like 2 little poms poms. And she pranced… Bear was like, “WOW!”
My poor friend was like, “Uh… why does a sexy black poodle have to live next door?” Because every morning at 6 am, Bear was at the window, jumping and barking to go outside. When my friend takes Bear to the park, Bear goes right up to the poodle and says, “Babe!” And the poodle looks at him like, “I have no idea who you are.”
Are you a career chaser? You can’t find your passion in life. Or you know what it is, for about 5 months but then can’t make it work so then you’re off and running starting a new job or a new career for the ump-teenth time?
You’re like Bear. You get all excited and see something you love. Then, you chase it. And you put all your eggs into one basket, lay it all out there and say, “Hey. Take it, Cindy. I’m all yours.” And your career of choice goes, “Meh. I’ll pass.”
Why does that keep happening? You have so much to offer. You’re a German Shepherd. Why can’t anyone see that? And what is she? She’s like a poodle? She needs someone like you! Is that what you’re thinking? That a company or an executive NEEDS someone like you, so why do they keep passing on you?
#1. You are offering TOO MUCH of yourself and TOO LITTLE of your service. I had a client who was trying to get work as a consultant. So he’d go to these companies, spend hours with them, doing everything from tying their shoe laces to looking at their legal matters. And they didn’t hire him. He said, “I offered so much value!” I said, “Actually you offered too much of yourself and too little of your service.”
Instead, offer your service as a free sample and leave. If they get results from your service, they will call you. If they don’t get results from your service, your service is no good.
But why are you over-doing it and spending the whole day with a company or an executive, befriending them, eating with them, shopping with them and then doing a LITTLE bit of work— and expecting them to hire you? It’s because you’re codependent. And that’s how you do ALL relationships, including your career. You want the whole tamale, all or nothing and you won’t let a job just be a job.
And you say, “Well that’s not fulfilling to me, to just have a job. To just service someone and leave. I want more meaning in my life and in my career.” What you’re essentially saying to any potential employer, client or co-worker is this, “Take ALL of me or take nothing at all.” So they always opt for nothing. People don’t want all of you. They only want a little of you. The best part of you. The part of you that can service their company, their business, their bank account or their relationships. That’s it.
Look at the poodle, dude. She doesn’t care if you’re unfulfilled in your life. Do you have a ball? A toy? A pepperoni treat? No. You have nothing to offer her but your furry self. And she’s not interested.
You cannot engage someone in a relationship before you engage them with your service. They don’t want to know you. They want to know your service. And through that SERVICE, they will love and appreciate YOU.
- SERVICE, first.
- YOU, second.
Don’t develop codependency in your business, practice, career or job. Develop service. And then you’ll get everything else that you want. Just ask Bear.
