Thought you had Mr./ Mrs. Right, but turned out to be wrong?
Did you just date someone who broke up with you after the two of you slept together? Are you feeling upset or mad at yourself because you let someone be intimate with you, you fell for them and then they left? A lot of women have that problem, they think that they slept with a man too soon… or didn’t realize his true intentions, which was just to have sex.
Or… you’re a successful man, attractive great guy and you meet a woman who you think is great, but after you’re together, like maybe you’re engaged, she turns out to be very mentally unstable?
Have you ever started dating someone who changed colors on you? And then you’re slapping yourself upside the head for letting yourself fall for someone who looked so right, but turned out to be so wrong?
Welcome to the 99%. You’re like most people— who are on the path to true love.
Pick an area of your life that you are perfect in.
- Is it your physique?
- Is it making money?
- Is it being smart?
If you’ve just been left by a man you were dating, after he slept with you, maybe you’ve never abandoned anyone. Are you thinking, “I am always there for someone when they need me. I’m there for my mom. I’m there for my sister. I’m there for my friends. I’ll come save them when they need me. I’ll drop everything to come and be with them.”
You’ve never abandoned anyone. You’re perfect in the area of not abandoning someone. So when it comes time for you to have true love, you have to attract someone who is perfectly imperfect in that area that you are perfect in.
It’s like if I was a Victoria Secrets model and I could eat all sorts of junk food and still look great. And one day, I wake up and I have gray hairs and some wrinkles. And I freak out! Because my whole life, I’ve been perfect in that one area— my looks.
In order for that Victoria’s Secret model to have true self love, she’s got to love those areas that she’s not perfect in and to love those imperfections because they are part of her deep innate wisdom. And once she is able to sympathize with people who have gray hair and wrinkles and see herself in them and embrace her flaws within herself and love others with those same flaws— she will heal her fear of becoming old. And come to a deeper understanding of what it means to be truly beautiful in herself and in others.
Back to why you dated someone who broke up with you after you slept with him/ her—if you are afraid of being abandoned; and you would never abandon someone. Just like the Victoria Secret model, she would never grow old by choice. But the moment you want true self love, or in this case, true love—- you need to embrace the fear of someone abandoning you or …. it’s OKAY for you to abandon someone. It’s OKAY….. to abandon people when your priorities come first or just because you don’t want to. Everyone has their own path. You do not have to save someone every single time. You know what— sometimes….. OH!!! People have to save themselves! Oh my goodness! We are allowed to have our fears. We are allowed to not save someone every single time. We are allowed to get old and not be young and beautiful outwardly forever.
The moment you can say, “It’s okay to have a moment of infidelity. It’s okay to doubt and really abandon someone. Because they might realize their mistake, they might not. But I can embrace everything in a relationship. The moments of abandonment. The moments of, “I’m sorry. I f–ed up. I can embrace those moments within myself and within a man…” There will be a level of composure and elegance within yourself that you will not be attracting a man who’s trying to teach you that same lesson over and over again… because you’ve learned it. You’ve graduated.
The model is going to attract plastic surgeons and botox specialists to help her erase her wrinkles. Once she accepts her wrinkles, she will be attracting better life partners, a book deal, new modeling contracts, Different types of sponsors that want to embrace her for her expanded and newfound beauty. A beauty that she did not possess when she was younger, a beauty that she could only flower when she became a more ripened rose. So you are going to attract better men who can have a full relationship. Who can accept you for all your flaws, for the times you are freaking out and you accidentally stab him in the eye — he can embrace your pain and your weakness because he gets it! He’ll respond to your fears, “We all get scared, we all accidentally stab our partners at times. I get it.”
As soon as you stop trying to do everything perfectly, you will finally attract a partner who doesn’t want you to be perfect… who just wants you.
You have to go through a couple duds to embrace your fear of being abandoned. Then, when you’re over it… you can attract a better man. The duds were ping pong practice. Now, you’re ready for real bullets!
